Indie Book of the day award winner

I'm very happy to announce that my book Armed and Outrageous is a book of the day award winner at indiebookoftheday.com The challenge is to find websites that you can promote your book and this is one of the up and comings. I'm very honored for my book to be picked. They don't just slap it up on any ole book there are requirements involved for one it must be an indie book! Cool to know there are places that support and help indie writers.

Thanks ~ Madison

I'm bringing sexy back

If you have read Armed and Outrageous you might have noticed I like to write sexual undertones. This is not intentional, it's just what comes out. It's those subtle hints that mean more than coming right out and saying it. No slag against erotica writers. I have written erotica before, I just don't think I'm that good at it. Plus, I'm not swaying in that direction just yet. 


I do believe there is a time and place for everything. I try and make an awkward as possible scene when it comes to the opposite sex. I don't believe in love at first sight, maybe lust at first sight, lol. I don't believe in soul mates either, but again, that's just me. When I read a book, I take it at face value. As a writer, we need to make readers believe the world in which we create is real.


I try and be clear cut as possible. I want the reader to feel like they are right there with my characters. I want them to hear them speak, feel the emotions they feel. Isn't that what it's about, writing something that makes the reader feel something? I hope you enjoyed the picture I thought it was cute.


Check out Armed and Outrageous on Amazon, Smashwords, or Barnes and Noble, and find out first hand that sexy is indeed back and has no age barrier. 

Six Days to Zombification

Image by the artist formally known as Nick Rose who is now known as Nixon Johns. 

Day one: A random stranger approaches you and bites your arm, and looking at it later, it doesn't look bad at all.

Day two: Your arm begins to throb and you pour peroxide on the wound believing it will work. Who needs a doctor, not me, right?

Day three: Your wound is beginning to fester and you wrap extra gauze on it before work. You hold it all day and a coworker notices while you're in the restroom. 

"Hey dude, what's wrong with your arm?"

"I was bitten in the park yesterday."

"Our park? You can't be serious, you went, there?" 


You show him your festering, pungent wound, and he begins backing away from you. "Dude you been ZOmbified."

"What in the hell??" You begin panting like some kind of lost puppy that ran for hours. 


"Is there anything I can do? I mean come on dude, help me out here - I don't want to be a zombie. I have nearly twenty thousand in my 401 for Christ's sake, and Betty told me she's ready."

"I heard someone found a cure, but. . . I don't think you want to do that."

"Tell me what it is, I'm desperate here." You begin shaking you co-worker for emphasis.

"Dude you need to cut your arm off."

Walking away in disgust, you take the rest of the day off.

Day four: You search around your house for a knife, deciding instead to buy a hatchet. You'd use an ax, but how in the hell can you swing it hard enough and your doctor refused to do the deed. 

Day five: You can barely stand the pain and it can't hurt more than it does now! Slapping your palm down on your picnic table, you brace and swing the hatchet downward - totally missing you arm altogether. You swing two more times before you finally hit your arm, and although painful, you continue to whack at your arm until it lies on the table in a bloody mass. You smile, wrapping up your stump and go inside and watch television.

Day six: You stumble into work, even though you have a barely concealed stump where you arm once was. Looking into the mirror, you notice just who is looking back. You have black circles surrounding your eyes, and your lips have pulled back from you face. F*ck, you'll never score with Betty now, although you may eat her later. One thought comes to mind, and going back into the office you eat your coworker that ever suggested you cut your arm off in the first place!

WARNING: IF BITTEN BY A ZOMBIE, YOU CAN'T BE CURED, AND CHOPPING THE LIMB WILL NOT CURE YOU. "CONSIDER YOURSELF ZOMBIFIED."

My Dad

I wanted to share a few antidotes about my dad.

I didn't learn to cuss like a sailor at school, I learned it from my dad! He couldn't assemble anything without swearing. Tools were also thrown at some point, lol.

He may look frail now, but he could whip his belt off his waist like nobody's business. I was whipped so much I thought my rear end was a whipping post. 


My dad always took us to search for the perfect Christmas tree at tree farms every December, like everyone in the state of Michigan. 


He always took us fishing. He'd stop at every fishing hole on the way to and from Tawas, MI. We went to Augres, MI, where you basically had to sit on rocks to fish. It was fun, at least I didn't have to worry about slipping through the cracks like at the dock in Tawas. I'm not sure how I'd slip through a crack, but when you're a kid you always believe at any moment something bad will happen to you.


My dad redefined child labor, we spent the every weekend in the woods. He cut the trees down and we were always on hand to carry it anywhere he wanted. He made a handy wood shoot so we could get in into the basement. I think us kids worked out our aggressions on each other for the most part.


When my dad took us to McDonald's, he'd order enough hamburgers so that we each had three, my mom always got a filet-o-fish.


My dad once gave us (I have two brothers), all a spanking because we argued on a holiday.


He worked second shift at a GM plant in Saginaw, MI.


My dad once took us to Sea World (back then it was in Ohio), and Cedar Point on the same vacation.


We went to visit my brother in Louisiana on vacation, and at the age of eighteen, I visited New Orleans.


My dad insisted on planting a huge garden, green beans were his favorite. Us kids had to pick the dang things the whole summer. They never quit growing! We literally filled five gallon buckets with them and had to take of the ends off. We hated this, and one time my dad got my younger brother Jimmy up at midnight because he didn't pick over his share.


My dad loved to whistle at other women when we were all in the car. Can you say awkward moment?


He insisted we drink milk at every meal. I now know why I don't drink any.


I never left the table until I ate everything on my plate or at least until I could get my brothers to eat it or learn a creative way to hide it in my napkin. I pretty much sat for hours.


My dad would make popcorn from the pan and fill half a brown grocery bag to take to the movies.


We went to the drive-in movies a lot. Monster movies were all the rage back in those days.


On our birthday, we always were treated to a restaurant and a movie. My dad was that awesome.


My dad took us to Tawas and we went camping at the park, we slept in a tent. We woke up at five a.m. to fish, apparently the fish wake up kinda early. One time there was a thunderstorm and the tent blew down on us. Good memories.


My dad knew all the best places to eat, buffets were another of his go to places. Yes, that includes Pizza Hut.


My dad loved to tickle me and always had me scratch his back.


No way was we going near the remote control, we watched whatever shows my dad wanted to watch.


Overall I have the best dad in the world. We never see eye-to-eye on many subjects, but I love him and I'm glad to have so many good memories.

Sample Sunday ~ Redneck Romance

Redneck Romance is my first try at straight romance. Please give me feedback on what you think about my opening chapter. Thanks. :)

I played with the knob of my car radio, trying to get in something besides religious sermons. Sure this is the bible belt, but really, I'm not that much of a holy roller. I had plenty of Lady Gaga on my IPod, but the battery died days ago, and I never really got around to recharging it. I'm not what you'd call a detail oriented girl.

When I looked up, I was barreling down on a wide-eyed hiker. I yanked my steering wheel sharply to the right, barely missing a him. I looked in my mirror in time to catch his appreciation. He flipped me two birds, and I cringed when I saw the contents of his backpack scatter across the road. Can’t blame the fellow really, I did practically run him down like a dog.

My eyes shifted toward the scenery, nothing but trees for miles and miles. At least the road was paved, otherwise, I would have felt completely lost. The trees were quite lovely with all the orange, red, and yellow leaves. I passed an occasional hiker, but they became few and far in between. I should try not to kill the next one I pass. Not that I had tried to run down a hiker on purpose. 

My cell vibrated in the pocket of my jeans, and I wiggled it out without managing to move out of lane and answered it.

"Hello."

"Kelly, if this is some kind of joke or prank to get back at me for not spoiling you more as I child, I don't appreciate it."

"Mom what are you talking about?" 

"I have a whole shindig planned for my birthday, and you aren't even going to be here."

Always the same guilt trip. 

"Mom I told you, I was going out of town if you listened."

"This from the woman that spent the last six months at my house whining about her ex." She sighed into the phone. "I hope you're not getting back with him."

"No, I have an assignment to take fall pictures."

"Where?"

I really didn't want to answer. "In North Carolina." 

"Please tell me it's not in the wilderness area you were talking about."

I almost cringed when she spoke, "Mom."

"Kelly Gray, I didn't bring you into this world so you can be murdered in the woods or worse."

I felt the urge to pound my head against my steering wheel. "I can take care of myself." Yeah right, if I don't get lost that is.

She laughed. "Do you even know where you are?"

Damn woman knew me too much. "Yes, I'm .... " I rustled the map on the passenger seat. 

"Your lost again, don't try to cover it up."

She continued to ramble on, and I shut my ears to her words. Although, she had a point, but I'd never admit it, not out loud.

"Mom, are you still there?" I pounded my cell on the dash. "I can't hear a word you're saying. I think the phone battery is dead."

"Don't you dare h-h-hang u-up."

I pushed the power button. I know I'm going to hell for cutting her off, but I hoped the man upstairs understood. I love my mom, but she's a bit clingy at times. Maybe I was whining a tad about my ex, but I thought a girl could tell her mom anything. Not my mom though, she much preferred to throw it in my face. Lesson learned.